Friday, November 04, 2005

Last day at our house

Well this is the morning of the day we take Amy to Chicago. This will be the last time she will be here until December of 2007. Of course we are spending the next 4 days in Wheaton with her. It is also her final goodbye to Ben. Ben is taking all this with a calm manner. He tells Amy not to leave, but he hasn't been sad, mad or acting out. I have been having many mixed feelings this week and I'm sure I will continue to feel more these next 4 days:

--Happy for her future that she has been planning for a long time.
--Sad that I will miss her being with us.
--Frustrated that she put off so many things to the last minute and didn't finish getting her stuff in the garage organized.
--Worried for her safety, health and the challenges she will face.
--Depressed because of the losses I will feel
--Concerned that she knows what to do in so many new areas.
--Helpless that I cannot protect her or give her advice as things happen.
--Excited that she will be independent
--Distracted by all the things here and at work.

I walked last night and thought of what she'll miss:

--3 Thanksgivings
--2 Christmases, Winters, Springs and Summers
--2 Birthdays
--2 High School Graduations of her cousins
--Plays, church things, a new movie, a friend getting married, maybe a birth
--Perhaps a funeral of Grandma and an aunt or others I don't know yet.

She has been working all week to finish all the things she needs to do:

She put a blog together and has sent E-mails out. She worked until who knows what time last night to finish. She has two suitcases and a backpack full of everything she will need for two years. Did she bring enough? Is she bringing things she will not need? Will she forget something? Will she be able to buy the things she doesn't have there? Her trip will tell and when she gets done she will know answers to all these things.

Well its time to get started with our day now and the beginning of a new phase in ours and her life.

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